Beacause of a culture that permits men to get away with whatever they do, and blames the women for men’s irresponsibilities in relationships, Simi says, Nigerian men do not fight for love in a relationship/marriage.
Recalling a Nigerian movie, where a woman was made to apologise to her husband who cheated on her, she says, men has a sense of entitlement that makes them misbehave in relationships.
In a chat with ’Nonye Ben-Nwankwo and Ademola Olonilua of Punch, Simi shares how women and our culture also contributes to this.
I don’t believe Nigerian men are romantic. I think Nigerian men do not think they have to be romantic. I am not saying this to bash men but I think no one pushes Nigerian men to fight for anything so they have this sense of entitlement.
I was watching a Nigerian movie one day and there was this unfaithful Nigerian man who left his wife for another woman. At the end of the day, the other woman left him and he retraced his steps to his initial wife.
The lady’s mother actually told her to kneel in front of the man and that bothered me a lot even though I knew it was a movie. That is the way things are.
A lot of men grow up in this country feeling entitled to certain things and they believe that they don’t have to work for anything. This has been the case for generations and a lot of our mothers were unhappy because the society expected them to stay in the relationship.
I am not saying it is the right thing for people to leave their relationships but a man needs to fight for what he wants so he can value it. I think the problem is because a lot of Nigerian men feel self-entitled and I blame our culture and our mothers.
Most mothers are the problem because when something happens, they are quick to advise the daughter and wives, they don’t tell the men that their actions are wrong. So if a man feels that he does not have to fight to keep the relationship, he would not.